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14:41, 28th March 2024 (GMT+0)

Vents with allowed responses - 3.

Posted by GamerHandle
Azazeal
member, 63 posts
Sat 19 Dec 2015
at 20:01
  • msg #262

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Evil Empryss:
If the theater is mostly empty, or there are other sections where there are four seats together for four people to sit, then those people can go sit in those seats. If we're talking about a mostly full theater where there are only sporadic seats, then I would consider moving over to let the group sit together. Their lack of planning still does not constitute a requirement for me to move though.

Well, you're never really required to do anything. But life is complicated, and mistakes get made. Moving over like, one seat isn't going to seriously impact your moviegoing experience too seriously, but a group of friends not being able to sit together might actually have a bigger impact on their experience. It seems awful judgemental and crotchety to hold against them a lack of planning like that. I know 90% of the time I go to the theaters, there's very few people there and seating isn't ever a problem. If I got surprised by it one time being randomly full, and someone were to lecture me about my lack of planning...well, I'd kind of find that person a bit stuck up.


@Tyr Hawk

Actually, it is a big deal. I had a really bad semester last semester due to a really severe bout of depression- I failed a lot of courses and barely passed a few. If I don't get straight A's I actually will lose my scholarship. Luckily, I got the results for that test back today and absolutely aced it.
Tyr Hawk
member, 129 posts
You know that one guy?
Yeah, that's me.
Sat 19 Dec 2015
at 20:20
  • msg #263

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Azazeal:
@Tyr Hawk

Actually, it is a big deal. I had a really bad semester last semester due to a really severe bout of depression- I failed a lot of courses and barely passed a few. If I don't get straight A's I actually will lose my scholarship. Luckily, I got the results for that test back today and absolutely aced it.

Leave it to me to detail the one scenario where it would actually be justified, and then you come back and tell me that's the one you're in. >_> FML.

Congrats on acing your final though! =D
Evil Empryss
member, 1408 posts
Because knowing
is half the battle!
Sat 19 Dec 2015
at 20:31
  • msg #264

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Oh, don't get me wrong, I wouldn't lecture them, I just wouldn't move. I've had to split up a group of my friends before to see a movie, but the last time that happened was for Independence Day's premier -- no, I had to do that for Avatar, too, and I didn't even consider trying to boot the kids from the handicapped seats. My family just split up and got seats where we could.  If it's that big a deal to them that they just have to sit together to be able to enjoy the movie, then it's on them to see that they see that they can achieve their goals with the least inconvenience to the rest of society.  They have other options that only inconvenience them, like catching another showing. Their problem, not mine.

But I tend to hold adults responsible for acting like adults, and your conscience may prick you more than mine does me. I can be crotchety at times, especially once I've sat myself down in my favorite spot in the theater. ^_^
Eggy
member, 671 posts
Sun 20 Dec 2015
at 22:45
  • msg #265

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Azazeal:
it would be just kind of generally dickish to refuse, and that it isn't really that big of a deal for people to ask someone to move down like one seat so that they can sit together.

Disagree. Those four people have a choice:

- show up a bit earlier and pick seats
- have one or two off their party show up a bit earlier and save seats
- be brave enough to sit through a film "alone"
- be whiny, begging brats
V_V
member, 511 posts
You can call me V, just V
Life; a journey made once
Tue 22 Dec 2015
at 07:51
  • msg #266

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

So sick.... so very, very sick. Haven't felt this bad since I've been in the hospital. Might have to go after all, if the fever doesn't go down or at least stay stagnant. Gods. No place to post, no time. Just on hee to give brief (incomplete update). IF my player see this, thank goodness. If not, I'm not dead...yet. *gone*

edit: (to sleep)
This message was last edited by the user at 07:51, Tue 22 Dec 2015.
V_V
member, 512 posts
You can call me V, just V
Life; a journey made once
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 03:33
  • msg #267

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Bebo8096
member, 53 posts
Hey, hey you...
Wanna buy a chinchilla?
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 16:57
  • msg #268

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

In reply to V_V (msg # 267):

*Throws chinchilla at you* have some cuddles, he also makes a good pillow. :) I do hope you get better soon.
V_V
member, 513 posts
You can call me V, just V
Life; a journey made once
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 18:08
  • msg #269

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

I can physically speak. My respiratory illness was mostly under control two nights ago when the fever finally broke. Now it's just emotional pain. More of the same I've spoke of ad-nauseam throughout. That's what I meant by being hoarse. I've pretty much spoken and cried until I just can't anymore. So figured I'd just put a song on here. A kingdom of dreams in the sand, soon to be an empire of dirt.

Someone, one of the last friends I thought I had, pretty much said "I've moved on" because I asked him for help and he wanted space. He said "we can still be friends, I've just moved on" when I asked him to clarify he just repeated himself. He had asked...it doesn't matter.

Basically just...down to two friends, one my roommate, one an online friend. A few more online buddies that chat, but nothing too deep.

It just seems like when I let the mask down, and show my true face, it makes people upset. I get kicked out of games. Have to quit to avoid the icy shoulder. Get told "I can't let you back in my game" and "When you told me you worked best in solo games, I should have listened. You were right" even though I never said that.

I just feel ostracized, by almost every circle. Those few that hang on, get hurt because they stay around me and I pull them down.

I called a suicide hotline, a few times in August to October. One man told me to call a warm line if all i wanted to do was talk, and wasn't "actually going to kill" myself. He recommended...it doesn't matter.

Like I said, I'm hoarse. I don't accomplish much by continuing to creak on. I just thought I'd try one more time.

I appreciate the chinchilla though, if only it were not a fleeting thing too.
Bebo8096
member, 54 posts
Hey, hey you...
Wanna buy a chinchilla?
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 18:20
  • msg #270

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

In reply to V_V (msg # 269):

*Hugs you long and hard* I can relate to the lack of friends, and in a way to the not being able show your true face. but, even though I don't know you, you have a friend in me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zy4uiiy0qgA (Sorry, had to link it.)
Brianna
member, 2028 posts
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 18:23
  • msg #271

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

In reply to V_V (msg # 269):

It sounds to me as though you could do with some therapy - and that the man you mentioned should NOT be working a suicide line!  Please look into it, there must be something around where you are, through a clinic, a church, some kind of support group, whatever!
V_V
member, 514 posts
You can call me V, just V
Life; a journey made once
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 18:42
  • msg #272

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Church is pretty much "Would you like to join the congregation?" "Oh, you're not part of the faith? Um..."

The clinic hasn't caught up with the times, and is reduced to physical maladies. I am saving for a therapist but can only afford once every three months and they need to take medicare.

The state mental hospital is corrupt, that's another story though. Luckily I wasn't committed, I was just worried. Red lights went up for several reasons I won't go into. I did meet a nice man, Kevin, whom was ejected. I gave him a ride to a motel (two actually, the Royals play-offs made the motels greedy) and we talked. He had been robbed by some heroine addicts, and basically was having renal problems, strokes and oxygen deficiency. So basically when he had an episode they misdiagnosed him being dangerous. He was waiting nearly ten hours to get a taxi ride, and the secretary had failed to communicate to get him the his ride slip. So I gave him a ride, he wasn't escaped, or if he was, three cops had full view of him coming and going and me talking to him about giving him a ride. Anyway, I gave him a ride.  He gave me some insider info, where other patients had been and liked, wished they could go again, what worked and didn't. It's expensive, but I don't dare take "free" help around here, law and medicine require investment or you lose more. Worse comes to worst, I can kite money, I'm just loath to.

I have a few places I've looked at. So I'm going to get therapy, it's a matter of money right now. If I get behind on the bills, which I have done, the doctor stops seeing me. All I can do is go to the emergency room since my therapy is neither legally mandated nor emergency stage. County mental health is a crap-shoot as I'd have to take taxi and might not be seen that day. No advance appointments. I have no one to take me (see elsewhere) no family that cares.

The point is that I am going to get therapy, yeah, I need help, I just have to find a way to get it. It's not from a lack of trying. I just don't know where to go. I'm going to keep trying though. That's all I can do. That's all I can do.
Evil Empryss
member, 1411 posts
Because knowing
is half the battle!
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 19:20
  • msg #273

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Look up "cognitive behavioral therapy" on the Internet and, if you can afford it, get yourself a workbook for it. CBT is very effective for dealing with the kinds of things you report dealing with, and it's probably wha of a therapist will have you doing anyway.

I'm not a psychologist (yet), but I'm married to one. ^_^
V_V
member, 515 posts
You can call me V, just V
Life; a journey made once
Thu 24 Dec 2015
at 20:56
  • msg #274

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Thank you, Evil Empryss. I already value your shrewdness, from looking at your posts about things like the horrid mechanic(s), and family disabilities that you/they adjust to live well. So I take this advice as a good source of information. A decision I need to consider of my own accord, but based on good character background.

I will certainly do that (look at the workbook and for it). Probably after the New Year, but actually a week after, not "My resolution for the year".

Anything I can do myself, at my own pace is best. I don't want to be held prisoner by caretakers again, and if I can do independent work with some therapist's guide (two nouns; a person to navigate, and the book to explain) I'll be best off.

So that's a lead to explore.

Anyway. It's time for me to enjoy my time with Anne. Since she got home early. So I'll do that. At the very least, this vent got me a new avenue, which I will explore. As degrading as it is to come on here asking for help, I'm glad I did.
This message was last edited by the user at 21:04, Thu 24 Dec 2015.
Brianna
member, 2029 posts
Fri 25 Dec 2015
at 01:30
  • msg #275

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

In reply to V_V (msg # 274):

This is your community, don't be afraid, or embarrassed to ask for help when you need it.  Most of us need at least a little help once in a while, or can at least imagine the possibility.

Try a different church?  You might even find one you would like to join.  :-)  I don't know what all resources should be available to you there; here in Canada there would be a Public Health office.  Even in this small town, there are a number of churches, some with support groups for various problems besides talking to the minister individually.  Some of them might require you to be a member, but I wouldn't expect most of them to (of course they would probably encourage you to join, even the best would think that was a good option, and indeed it could be for many, faith can get one through a lot of hard times)
ShadoPrism
member, 889 posts
OCGD-Obsessive-Compulsive
Gamer-Disorder
Mon 28 Dec 2015
at 15:00
  • msg #276

Re: Edition Wars? Really?

Learning how to use my phone to post is very frustrating. Three times just this morning I thought I had lost my post from hitting the wrong button. Fortunately I learned that the Tab like function on my phone aloud me to find my post, twice and I was able to post it. Though the placement of the Cancel button so near the styled text drop down about killed me this morning. On my phone both are tiny even at full magnification.
Silverlock
member, 97 posts
Tue 29 Dec 2015
at 15:18
  • msg #277

Tabletop Game Slump

Here's the problem: Beloved Spouse and I have been in a tabletop group that meets about three times a month.  Allegedly GMs take turns, yet the current GM has had our PCs on an interminable fetch quest for going  on 3 years REAL time....and I know this cos I am the notekeeper, in charge of keeping the GM honest (ex: one week we fought 22 adversaries, killed 9, he stops for the night and next week we have 38 adversaries to fight....and this has happened more than once.)  There is no end of the game in sight and the Evil Overlord is practically unfindable and untouchable....I killed off my excellent PC in a heroic attempt to kill the Overlord that merely slightly inconvenienced said Overlord; high explosives were involved.  And now after 2 2/3 years we find that there are even more powerful and evil overlords who literally watch our every move and destroyed a war machine IN TEN SECONDS, that had taken over a year of gametime to build. I don't want to ruin the friendship of 15 years but this has become a night of Dreaded Boredom and futility, with pointless sidetrips for no information to be gained but plenty of equipment to be expended.....and the last time experience points were given out it was over two years ago.

Suggestions?  We considered GM bingo cards, but that seems rude.
And I've read the rulebooks over and over, which has helped with some of the nonsense, but being the rules lawyer is no fun either.   Help?  Beloved spouse can't even stay awake during the session...
Eggy
member, 673 posts
Tue 29 Dec 2015
at 17:48
  • msg #278

Tabletop Game Slump

Silverlock: How long before your group meets again? How about offering to give the current GM a break? If this were baseball, he'd be pulled off the field for pitching lemons. A sub would come in. I think a good idea would be to make it feel inclusive to take off the sting. Like it's a chance for everyone to start fresh, not just the players. But I'm not always good at sparing feelings. I hope it goes well.


Small vent: Running into the rude in-law at holiday parties. (I've got rude relatives of my own, but there was one in-law that I kept running into at holiday parties and dinners with a particularly tiresome string of comments.)

Lady, I've been married to your nephew for nearly a decade now. He's not "going through a phase." He doesn't have "a taste for the exotic." We're a family. That's it. That's all you need to say. Why can't you just sit quietly and be glad someone still likes you enough to invite you to join us?</vent>
Tyr Hawk
member, 134 posts
You know that one guy?
Yeah, that's me.
Tue 29 Dec 2015
at 17:50
  • msg #279

Tabletop Game Slump

In reply to Silverlock (msg # 277):

Sit down with the GM, tell them straight-up that you're not enjoying things the way they are. You'd love to continue playing the campaign, but there needs to be some changes. Then, discuss what's going well (this is important, because if it's all negative then you have a much bigger problem), and what's not. If there are other players, make certain they're in on the conversation too. A game is a collaborative effort between all the players and the GM so, if the majority isn't happy, something needs to change. If he isn't willing to change things, then he shouldn't be GMing. If being willing to act like an adult about this ruins your friendship, then methinks it's not a good friendship in the first place.

It's a simple, straightforward route, and I suggest taking it ASAP.
Silverlock
member, 98 posts
Wed 30 Dec 2015
at 13:53
  • msg #280

Tabletop Game Slump

In reply to Tyr Hawk (msg # 279):

The GM's own wife quit the game as she routinely fell asleep from boredom (the spouse is a friend of hers) - this did not faze him; the game is held at his house.  We meet next Monday. There's no collaborative effort of players and GM, his game runs on rails (with stops at all local, pointless stations).  The game system  itself is supposed to be active, dynamic, cinematic, etc....it's had all the joy sucked out of it.

Next up on the GM list is the second-most boring GM who for some reason loves the canals of Mars....so no improvement there - "You travel along the canal, Martians attack, you fight them". Also the current GM's best friend.  So there's no majority to bring up a united front of "you're a terrible GM".

I will try suggesting some munchkin or board games again, to break up the monotony...but it's looking like a confrontation would be the end of friendship, the GM really does think he's giving us wonderful puzzles and events and that we are ENJOYING ourselves -when the players literally need to be nudged awake when they have something to do in-game.
Eggy
member, 674 posts
Wed 30 Dec 2015
at 14:04
  • msg #281

Tabletop Game Slump

What about some one-shot RPs to give other players a shot at running?
Tyr Hawk
member, 135 posts
You know that one guy?
Yeah, that's me.
Wed 30 Dec 2015
at 17:09
  • msg #282

Tabletop Game Slump

In reply to Silverlock (msg # 280):

Even with all of that, talk to him. If he thinks you're enjoying yourselves, you are not communicating. If you're not communicating, then you need to try a tactic that more directly confronts the issues. If you think it's pointless to try and talk it out like an adult, that the GM won't listen or, worse, they'll pretend to listen but won't change anything, then just stop playing.

You're not enjoying yourself, your beloved spouse isn't either, so stop doing what you're both not enjoying. Talking to people has solved many, many issues over the years (not just for me, but for the world at large). It's not always the perfect solution, but avoiding the issue obviously hasn't solved it. Suggesting other games hasn't solved it (or so I assume when you say 'again' in your reply). So maybe actually talking about the issue directly (something you haven't admitted to trying yet) will work. You can't know unless you give it a shot.

And, again, if this is going to end your friendship, I'll say good riddance. I don't know much about either of you, so take this with a heaping handful of salt, but if telling someone you don't enjoy their GMing style is going to end a friendship of a decade and a half then that's not what I'd call a friendship in the first place. When he's left with only himself and his boring best friend to play with, maybe his tune will change. Maybe it won't, but that's his problem, not yours.

Sorry if this sounds like a vent. >_> It sort of is one, but it's also the advice I think you should take.
matthewfenn
member, 413 posts
www.nj-pbem.com
Northern Journey PBeM DM
Wed 30 Dec 2015
at 18:04
  • msg #283

Tabletop Game Slump

Agreed - communication is the key.

I know its not quite the same, but I used to DM for a group of friends who went back to college days and 2nd Ed D&D.   I played 3.5 and Pathfinder here on RPOL and got into the new system, and we started a new campaign in Pathfinder with me DMing...  All went well for several sessions, but eventually, after one session where my oldest friend's character had just failed a saving throw (or three) and was ill with swamp fever.. he got all grumpy and we ended the session early.  Next session he (and the other players) admitted that they just really didn't like the new rules (especially the emphasis on tactical combat)  and preferred the old more free-form 2nd edition stuff.   I was gutted, but didn't hold it against him and he is still my best mate.

In fact, he DMs now, so I can't complain too much - though I do miss all that tactical combat stuff :-)
Merevel
member, 1002 posts
Gaming :-)
Very unlucky
Wed 30 Dec 2015
at 20:38
  • msg #284

Tabletop Game Slump

Bleh, I know the feeling. I know so many people who claim they want to pick up tabletop gaming, but every single one of them refuses to sit down and talk about a time to play, or even consider making time to play.

Oh well.
Eggy
member, 677 posts
Thu 31 Dec 2015
at 13:04
  • msg #285

Tabletop Game Slump

Getting approved for "pre-check"/the quick line or whatever they call it, then being called out of that group so  TSA can pat down my hair. Makes me feel gross. I'm pretty darn vain about my hair.

Oh! And someone bumped into me with exposed velcro. Snagged my nylons.
This message was last edited by the user at 13:15, Thu 31 Dec 2015.
Palomino
member, 13 posts
Thu 31 Dec 2015
at 20:18
  • msg #286

Tabletop Game Slump

In reply to Eggy (msg # 285):

There is almost no part of the TSA that doesn't make me livid. I want to demand why they think they can do things like that but I'm afraid they'll use it as an excuse to detain me.
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