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14:11, 29th March 2024 (GMT+0)

Vents with allowed responses - 3.

Posted by GamerHandle
Kessa
member, 606 posts
Dark Army:
Out to Lunch
Wed 22 Jan 2020
at 21:57
  • msg #1512

Sad to see you go

This is a sad thing to hear, V_V. Though I have not often had much to contribute, I have greatly empathized with your posts over the years. I wish you a peaceful trip home and hope you find happiness there. I wish we could keep you longer.
aguy777
member, 329 posts
Join Date:
Thu, 28 Nov, 2013
Thu 23 Jan 2020
at 02:43
  • msg #1513

Sad to see you go

I'm saddened to hear you're leaving, V_V. I enjoyed seeing you around. Thank you for the turkey sandwich recipe you shared with me well over a year ago. I'll be sure to give a toast to you every time I have one. I hope your trip home is peaceful and serene; it's the least you deserve.
tibiotarsus
member, 117 posts
Hopepunk with a shovel
Thu 23 Jan 2020
at 09:51
  • msg #1514

Uh.

This sounds kind of more final than leaving RPoL, and makes me deeply worried and a bit upset.

I don't know you, mate, but remember that if you die, others get to define you on that tombstone. Hoboing across a continent, meeting a wild coyote, helping people, finding love like a bright stone in a stream, writing a novel, eating ice cream, standing in front of a tank because no-one else will...those are things alive people do. Me, I refuse to die before [indicates certain dictators], because damsons, I mean to see a world without them. Hope you read this.
V_V
member, 897 posts
Just like that...
my journey..finds me home
Thu 23 Jan 2020
at 15:35
  • msg #1515

Uh.

First off.  I had an episode big time. I remember doing it, but just I didn't really have much coherency. There's and acronym HALT. Well I was all four. Hungry, I needed food, and my friend hadn't gotten any.
Angry, I get the brakes replaced on the car $700 give her gift card to the grocery, let her get to work in my car, and she doesn't buy groceries. It's icy, we just got home from a HORRIBLE doctor's appointmen, I'm tired. We fight, I try to step out, it gets melodramatic. I just disconnect from her, and post that above, trying to appeal to some other way of connecting. I wanted also to just get away, remove myself. In the post is some truth, some suspicion, a lot of genuine appreciation of people's patience and outpouring of care. Wanting to go home, be in place I can't be kicked out of, that has food, that I can relax in, invite friends over.

I had just gotten home from that HORRIBLE doctor's appointment. I was tired from it and the night before. I was lonely, as my best friend is just making things worse.

Then there was the issue of an RPoL troll and her harpy cove. They've harassed me for about eight years. Suffice to say they picked a bad time to get into with me.

I just felt like, somehow if I wished hard enough, like watching movie that ends badly even though you don't want it to, that I could just go home.

I also know I need to disconnect from most people Online. It's too much. I get overwhelmed. So I get irritable. So people see this pattern. I felt like just escaping to a safe place. I wanted to say goodbye. I shouldn't have, and when I woke up I've tried to reconcile with this bad choice.

Don't go on Social media or get on the phone HALT. I don't...but I do...here.

I don;t get most of your idea tibiotarsus. I've been literal hobo. I can barely walk to the grocery store, hence the need to go to a doctor. Coyotes alkso live literally less than half mile from my fornt apartment door. They're right near the apartment complex. They had to issue signs to idiots that said "don't feed the coyotes" that's a horrible way a die...and even worse to live. I avoid their space, it was there';s first. Love, yeah, that;s been my solace. Standing up for people. Yeah, I know someone who left China who was at the  tiananman square campus. I don;t know much, but I know what little next to know one else does, unless they were there. I'd stood up to thugs. Police racism and injustice. A guy in gamestop pulling out knife ona girl over a videogame not being bought. Just yeatserday I gave my Christmas present to guy who had sign, in the sleet and snow that said "Anything would be make my New Year Better" I don;t live to help, but I help where when and how I can. You don't knoe me though. So I'll suffice you and I have different ways of expressing things. I don't get you, and I sense you don't get me. Which I'm fine with.

Aguy777 Ha! Yeah, I've been eating those for like three months straight, along with hotdogs. It's horrible for my weight though. I gained so much weifght trying to fatten my wallet. Yeah, that was failed thread I made, but I'm glad you cared to remember the recipe. MAke sure the red onion is cut and used soon. After making it a severla dozen times, the onion goes bad quick. Unrefrigerated or in the fridge. I love that red onion though, so but it doesn't keep long. I need to find DIY tips that are credible, there's some I dubious of, and some have been shown to be downright dangerous. But I'll eventually have the courage and time to just find a way to expand shelf life, or whatever once cut. I even tried partially peaaling it. That was actually worse. O_o. I still enjoy that sandwich though. I need to go the gorcery and get that. So I'll be brief.

@Kessa. That's sweet. Well, I....all I can say is that I appreciate and am humbled you found identifaction with my posts. You contributed here, and by the looks of it, just about as much as I have given I;ve been here with I think 2001-ish and then 2004 after a break. My post count is miniscule. I aspire to catch up with BBR's record....eight years ago...-_- You contributed to me feeling welcome. If your';re on here, you almost definitely game. ;D So maybe we should game sometime, or just chat, or focus on good things, and try to find ways to get back to them and avoid the bad. If you're resonating with my posts it's gotta be tougher for you than me.
I gotta get past letting bad influence keep getting my attention. It poisons my potential to have friends. It makes me bitter. If someone remembers a trukey sandwish around my Thanksgiving alone, then that's awesome! IF someone feel like  they wish I could I stay, I'll make an effort., IF someone wants to me to read their post, the least I can is read it, and write the best reply I can given my OCD will make that a many hour long process.

ShadoPrism You've been a good adversary and ally. I felt like your opinions helped define mine, whether I agreed or not, it changed my opinion, sometimes father away, and sometimes closer. I've also seen you ihn games, and we've been good. I've also seen you in games I made it worse for everyone. I appreciate the evenness. It's like my friend Tom. Tom and Krogan actually. Tom is like this guy who I don't know why, but everytime I (for years at least over decade! actually...) would joijnh my D&D games. Fail and fgail as they did. I really did a number on him, and must have titred his pateience, but he's such a gerenous and kind and mostly consistent guy. Just, like that person who says he'll pick you up at 4:00 Pm and it starts raining at 4 PM, so he arrived like five minute early. Or there's someone else who needs a ride, and so he calls you and says "Hey I'll be late" and means like five minutes late. I've tried to defend him, against other players who think he may be selfish, because I know Tomn, well enough to know when something being aid is far from the truth. He's just like "don't worry about it. I was going to post, but I'll just let it be" So chill, yet so considerate. I really should...try to get in touch with him (is that okay to say [mods]?) I miss him. And Krogan. Another great friend I've had. He's heard me just, at my worst. IT's his honesty, even if harsh, it was always consideerate; that helps me overcome, strive to just keep trying. I feel most like I...wasn't doing right by doing what I did.

Now that that's said. I will stop. Restrict my access to forums. And not get on here, or any part of this site HALT. I need to check on my friend Anne, she's been asleep for like...god...like fifteen hours!
tibiotarsus
member, 118 posts
Hopepunk with a shovel
Thu 23 Jan 2020
at 20:53
  • msg #1516

Thanks for replying & apologies

I'm really sorry. We're so similar in terms of things you've described I just keep trying to help with reminders of stuff that keeps me alive and apparently offending you/really not helping. I understand now that you can't read me and/or I feel threatening or mean (sarcastic? flippant?) because of that. Please know it's not deliberate, that I know it's OK not to like/trust/want to hear from every internet random who crosses one's path, and that I will remember to let you be if we encounter each other in future. I really didn't mean to make things awkward and socially worse and I'm truly sorry for it. [apology bow] Probably best I stay off this thread in general, TBH.
ShadoPrism
member, 1294 posts
OCGD-Obsessive-Compulsive
Gamer-Disorder
Thu 23 Jan 2020
at 22:54
  • msg #1517

Thanks for replying & apologies

I wish I could remember what games we were in together V_V. I have had a few to many mini-strokes (TAI) though and my long term memory is pretty shot. But thanks for the feed back, glad I am in balance somewhere at least.
I pretty much just do the forums here anymore. Mostly it seems to be this one for some reason.

I vaguely recall a couple games I managed to shoot up pretty badly. One VTM game and one Naruto game, both long ended. Not even sure which site they were on anymore either, I started on PBW then moved here.
Rpol is my homepage, just to give you all some idea how often I come and see if anyone posted anything interesting. Rambling, I know. So I will stop for now.

Hope things get better for you V_V.
Kessa
member, 607 posts
Dark Army:
Out to Lunch
Fri 24 Jan 2020
at 03:11
  • msg #1518

Thanks for replying & apologies

I'm glad to hear that the morning found you feeling much better and things were not quite so bad as they seemed last night. My time and attention to RPoL tends to be sporadic based on life events, but yes, I've been around a while now, like you. It's always hardest to find the good, but without it, we wouldn't feel the bad so pointedly. So, somewhere, there must be good things happening if we can still tell the difference. I only have a few pointed games I play on RPoL, but if we should find ourselves in one, I would be happy for it. ^_^
aguy777
member, 330 posts
Join Date:
Thu, 28 Nov, 2013
Fri 24 Jan 2020
at 09:20
  • msg #1519

Thanks for replying & apologies

I'm glad to hear you're doing better today than you were yesterday, V_V. As for the sandwich, I couldn't agree more with the red onion. It always goes bad before I can use it all. Let me know if you find a way to make it last longer (other than eating it all before it goes bad, of course!).

@ShadowPrism: Mini-strokes? Take care of yourself! I like seeing you around here.
SunRuanEr
subscriber, 192 posts
Fri 24 Jan 2020
at 11:32
  • msg #1520

Thanks for replying & apologies

quote:
I couldn't agree more with the red onion. It always goes bad before I can use it all. Let me know if you find a way to make it last longer

Having only one onion eater in my house, I've had good luck with sealing up the onion (once peeled and cut into) in a baggie, with as much air squeezed out as possible and being sure that the baggie is tight to the cut side, and then putting that into another container with an airtight lid, either glass or sturdy plastic. Then it goes into the fridge. That usually manages to keep it good enough to use almost all of it up, if not all. If it changes the taste noticeably, the onion eater in the house has never complained.
This message was last edited by the user at 11:33, Fri 24 Jan 2020.
Z.Dianli
member, 32 posts
Sat 25 Jan 2020
at 07:05
  • [deleted]
  • msg #1521

Dystopian Nightmare for Ad Clicks

This message was deleted by a moderator, as it was against the forum rules, at 08:40, Sat 25 Jan 2020.
Z.Dianli
member, 33 posts
Sat 25 Jan 2020
at 09:22
  • [deleted]
  • msg #1522

Dystopian Nightmare for Ad Clicks

This message was deleted by a moderator, as it was against the forum rules, at 09:36, Sat 25 Jan 2020.
Isida KepTukari
member, 333 posts
Thu 30 Jan 2020
at 04:33
  • [deleted]
  • msg #1523

Just GO Already!

This message was deleted by the user at 22:46, Thu 30 Jan 2020.
Isida KepTukari
member, 337 posts
Elegant! Arrogant! Smart!
Mon 17 Feb 2020
at 06:05
  • msg #1524

Travel for what?!

Hubby and I took some time off for our anniversary week.  Long story short, at one point during the week Hubby wanted to travel to a distant mall to shop for clothes.  Originally he wanted to go to one nearly nine hours away because it also had a chain restaurant he adores that isn't in our area, but I put my foot down on that.  So he insisted on going to one two-plus hours away for a "fun couple's shopping trip".

Guys, it's an outlet mall, near Chicago, in February.  It was dangerously cold that day, and I nearly froze my face off.  Not to mention the fact that I am a big, big woman, so there is exactly one store there I can go to where I can buy things off the rack. Shopping for clothing, for me, is generally an unhappy, depressing experience that I like to avoid unless I am in a very particular frame of mind.  Hubby is on the more "normal" end of the size spectrum, and can just go into any men's clothing store, find things in his size, never have to use the fitting room, and walk out with exactly what he wants within ten minutes.

I really didn't want to travel nearly a five-hour round trip, plus shopping time, to be frozen, depressed, and resentful.  He said that he "hadn't gotten new shirts in a year."  I'm not stopping him from buying shirts.  He is more than welcome to buy shirts at any time.

Next time he can shop on his own, as I will be home relaxing instead of feeling resentful towards the entire women's fashion industry and Hubby being oblivious.
Brianna
member, 2209 posts
Mon 17 Feb 2020
at 08:48
  • msg #1525

Travel for what?!

In reply to Isida KepTukari (msg # 1524):

Maybe you should try making suggestions for what he should buy?  Totally impractical ones of course, because you don't want it to backfire into him wanting you to always do his shopping.
Isida KepTukari
member, 338 posts
Elegant! Arrogant! Smart!
Mon 17 Feb 2020
at 12:10
  • msg #1526

Travel for what?!

I am, I believe, going to try for the extremely direct approach of: "This is the precise opposite of fun for me. Finding one mildly interesting item in one store for me, and four shirts in a store for you, is not fun, is not cost-effective, and to me is a huge waste of time when it comes with a five-hour round trip. I will be staying home on future excursions of this nature."

I never have to worry about his clothing; he chooses about the same four colors in two different designs, always has.  I don't worry about setting him loose in a mall, I just don't want to be drug along on a ridiculously long trip for something he could get locally.
OceanLake
supporter, 1098 posts
Wed 19 Feb 2020
at 00:39
  • msg #1527

Travel for what?!

IMOs

1. Something else is going on in hubby's mind. The trip is a substitute for something.

2. There's something to be said for openness and honesty in a marriage.
Kessa
member, 608 posts
Dark Army:
Out to Lunch
Wed 19 Feb 2020
at 07:24
  • msg #1528

Travel for what?!

It rather sounds like he enjoys this and wants to include you as part of quality time together, particularly since it's such a time intensive trip to either place and not taking you might seem neglectful to him. Which is a nice idea, except that rather than a trade off between what movie to watch, or coffee to buy, this isn't just a minor thing to sigh off for you, but really truly miserable. Which really quite defeats the purpose of quality time (making people feel closer) and actually results in the exact opposite. I do think the direct approach is best. He might feel let down his idea was not well received, but at least he will understand it's not a rejection of him... just this particular miserable thing. And perhaps together you can find something more enjoyable to do with the rest of your time off together you both will enjoy.
Isida KepTukari
member, 340 posts
Elegant! Arrogant! Smart!
Wed 19 Feb 2020
at 09:44
  • msg #1529

Travel for what?!

We did several other fun things together during our anniversary week, just that shopping trip was the bummer.  I think Hubby might be conflating the shopping with some fun we had on a more elaborate destination vacation we took a few years back; we also did some shopping on the way there and back, and it was nice because it broke up a lengthy car drive and made for fun travel, but the main part of the vacation was a theme park (where we had a blast).  We're going on an expensive trip next winter, so this last week was just mostly small, local activities.  This was, I think, his idea of a day trip, but it was... not well-timed and not well-discussed.
SunRuanEr
subscriber, 215 posts
Fri 28 Feb 2020
at 21:21
  • msg #1530

Stupid car

I hate my eldest child's car so much. It's in the shop at least three times a year, something's always broken on it even when it isn't, it's ridiculously difficult to fix even when things can be repaired because it's a flipping Mini, and I generally just want to stuff it full of fireworks and put it out of its misery. I can't sell it and get them something sensible and non-crappy because it's in the ex's name and not mine, and said ex thought it was a wonderful idea to give a ragged-out Mini with over 150k miles on it to an at-the-time teenager because they were too lazy to sell it (when the kid had a different car already, which they took away to replace with the Mini, and then sold), and then said teenager thought the Mini was "too cool" to give up, even when offered a much more sensible, lower mileage, cheaper to insure, in better shape Honda Accord FOR FREE six months later.

...and now I have to let the kid borrow my car because they're supposed to take their sibling to a basketball game tomorrow (and the sibling doesn't deserve to have to miss the game because the Mini's a hot stinking pile of garbage), and the stupid thing's in the shop again and their other parent is (conveniently) out of town.

Stupid car. I don't know if all Minis are like this, but dear god I hate this one so much.
This message was last edited by the user at 21:24, Fri 28 Feb 2020.
OceanLake
supporter, 1102 posts
Sat 29 Feb 2020
at 04:46
  • msg #1531

Stupid car

Who pays for the repairs?
SunRuanEr
subscriber, 216 posts
Sat 29 Feb 2020
at 14:26
  • msg #1532

Stupid car

Not me, thankfully, but only because I put my foot down over a year ago and said I wasn't paying anything else for it. Usually the kid and their dad wind up paying some combination of costs. If he thinks it's "her fault" (somehow, a timing chain was driver error, as example) he makes her pay for it entirely.

Edit: Asked her what the mileage was on it when she showed up to get my car this morning. I quoted woefully low - it's at 285k now, on a 12 year-old vehicle. *shudders*
This message was last edited by the user at 16:18, Sat 29 Feb 2020.
Ski-Bird
subscriber, 73 posts
Sat 29 Feb 2020
at 16:30
  • msg #1533

Stupid car

I would walk away from the Mini.  If this thing is being a bit of a money pit, there are thousands (tens of thousands) of cars that you guys could opt to replace it with.  Never underestimate the value of a $2,000 beater.

The sting of paying the $2,000 upfront will be offset by not bringing the Mini in to the garage every two months.
SunRuanEr
subscriber, 217 posts
Sat 29 Feb 2020
at 17:24
  • msg #1534

Stupid car

Oh, believe me, I know. I just can't convince either of the parties that can legally make that call (the kid, who is an actual adult now, or my ex who owns it) that it's in their best interests to do so. One's irresponsible and lazy, and the other isn't yet past thinking that "cool" things are worth paying for. Which one is which depends on the day.

If I had enough disposable income lying around to just up and buy her another car, I would. Even then it would probably be a waste (per the mention of turning down the free Honda Accord she was offered last year) because she's foolishly in love with the Mini and refuses any replacement other than MY car - which she repeatedly makes comments about 'When can I have your car?' Unfortunately for her, despite being almost twenty years old, it's under 90k miles and in great condition and I love it and am therefore not ready to part with it any time soon. Certainly not just to save her and her dad from their own stupidity.

Dumb cars. Dumb young adults. Dumb parents buying their kids' love with 'cool' things that are impractical.
OceanLake
supporter, 1103 posts
Sat 29 Feb 2020
at 20:32
  • msg #1535

Stupid car

I suggest:
No borrowing your car.
No ever giving her your car unless you already promised to do so.
Tough love

(Alas, easy to give such advice)
Silverlock
member, 107 posts
Sun 1 Mar 2020
at 20:54
  • msg #1536

Blamestorming at work

How is it that 7, yes, 7 bosses of my 9 bosses (yes, convinced I work for Ring wraiths) hold a 1.5 hour meeting on who to blame for not running a test on a specific sample when 1 boss selects the schedule; another boss is supposed to check it that the proper tests be run, having access to that information, a higher boss is supposed to check THAT, then a higher boss still is supposed to check HIS work, and then the boss of the sampling crew is supposed to check 'does this look right, as he am the one who oversees the paperwork after the previous bosses pass it along to me' and the boss below that one is supposed to check for the same thing, then the next boss in charge of what comes into the lab for lab work is supposed to check for that same thing again.....And when all of them fail to do their assigned work, for which they are paid handsomely, they all desperately try to point the finger of blame at the two unfortunates at the very bottom of the ladder, who are the mere flunkies following their written orders (the orders that were supposed to be checked by said bosses).  These are the flunkies who would be told they are wasting company time and resources if they sampled anything incorrectly, mind you.  The more bosses I have, the less work they do, and now that they all figure the OTHER boss will do the work, none of the work gets done and they blame the two poorest paid not-boss workers in the chain for their mistake.  Did I mention that tax payers are paying their lavish salaries ?  And, more unfortunately, the people who need to be told that this waste goes on are the relatives of said aforementioned bosses, so you know that's not going to be corrected. Perhaps some other relative must be hired as a boss, since 7 of them are not enough to their jobs correctly.  Now all the bosses are angry and looking for trouble.
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